Stress, uncertainty and self-doubt are familiar experiences for many veterinary professionals. Whether you're navigating a challenging case, adjusting to a new role or questioning your abilities, there will be moments when your confidence takes a knock.

In a profession where expectations are high and decisions can carry significant consequences, it's easy to become your own harshest critic. You might find yourself replaying a difficult conversation, worrying about what colleagues think or feeling that you should already have all the answers.

But what if, instead of allowing those thoughts to hold you back, you could learn to coach yourself through them?

Self-coaching is about developing the ability to pause, reflect and ask yourself better questions. It's a skill that can help you manage challenging situations, recognise your potential and take greater ownership of your personal and professional development.

The good news? You don't need to be a professional coach to start.

Why Self-Coaching Matters in Veterinary Medicine

When we think about professional development, we often focus on external support. We look to mentors for guidance, managers for feedback and colleagues for reassurance. While these relationships are incredibly valuable, they won't always be available when we need them most.

That's where self-coaching comes in.

Self-coaching encourages you to take responsibility for your own growth rather than relying entirely on others to provide direction. It involves stepping away from the pressure of daily tasks and creating space to consider where you are, what you want and how you might move forward.

Think about riding a bicycle. You can pedal as hard as possible, putting enormous effort into moving forward, but without knowing where you're heading, all that energy might take you in the wrong direction.

The same is true of your career. Working harder doesn't necessarily mean you're making progress towards what matters most to you.

Self-coaching helps you replace constant activity with purposeful action. By regularly reflecting on your experiences, questioning your assumptions and identifying opportunities for improvement, you can develop greater clarity and confidence in your decisions.

Recognising the Stories You Tell Yourself

One of the biggest obstacles to confidence isn't always the situation we're facing. Sometimes, it's the story we tell ourselves about that situation.

Imagine you're a newly qualified veterinarian dealing with an unfamiliar clinical case. You recognise that you need advice from a more experienced colleague, but a thought enters your mind: I should already know how to do this.

Suddenly, what should be a straightforward learning opportunity becomes a source of anxiety.

You might start questioning your competence, worrying about how others perceive you or avoiding asking for help altogether.

This is where self-coaching can make a difference.

Rather than accepting your first thought as the truth, challenge it with a more constructive question. Instead of telling yourself that you should already know the answer, consider what advice you would give a student facing the same situation.

Would you expect them to know everything? Or would you encourage them to ask questions, seek support and use the experience to develop their knowledge?

Often, we're far more understanding of other people's learning journeys than we are of our own.

The goal isn't to eliminate every negative thought. It's to recognise when your thinking is limiting you and create space for a more helpful perspective.

Moving from Reaction to Response

When stress levels rise, our immediate reactions can take over. We become frustrated, defensive, anxious or overwhelmed, sometimes responding before we've had an opportunity to properly consider the situation.

Self-coaching helps interrupt this pattern by encouraging a shift from reacting automatically to responding intentionally.

Consider a difficult interaction with a client. Perhaps they've questioned your recommendation, challenged the cost of treatment or expressed frustration about an unexpected outcome.

Your initial response might be to feel personally criticised. You may become defensive or start questioning whether you've handled the consultation correctly.

Instead of allowing those emotions to determine what happens next, take a moment to recognise what you're experiencing.

Ask yourself what you're feeling, why you're feeling it and what matters most in the situation. You might realise that your frustration comes from wanting to provide excellent care while feeling that your professional judgement is being questioned.

Once you understand what's happening internally, you're better positioned to decide how to respond. Sometimes, this process can be as simple as taking three deep breaths, identifying your immediate priority and choosing one constructive action.

It won't necessarily remove the pressure, but it can help you approach the situation with greater clarity.

Using the Self-Coaching Wheel to Find Clarity

Stress and self-doubt don't always come from one obvious source. Sometimes, they're the result of several areas of our lives becoming difficult to manage.

You might feel confident in your clinical abilities but struggle with communication. Perhaps you're progressing professionally but neglecting your personal development or finding it difficult to maintain healthy habits outside work.

The Self-Coaching Wheel is a practical reflection tool designed to help you identify where you're feeling strong and where you might need additional attention.

The approach involves examining eight areas of your performance or mindset and rating your current satisfaction with each one. By visualising these scores, you can begin to recognise patterns that might otherwise go unnoticed.

For example, you might discover that your confidence is relatively high, but your ability to manage stress or ask for support is much lower. Rather than viewing this as a failure, use it as an opportunity to identify what needs to change.

The purpose isn't to achieve a perfect score in every area. It's to become more aware of your current situation and make intentional decisions about your development.

Revisiting the wheel monthly, or following a particularly challenging period, can also help you recognise progress that might otherwise be overlooked.

Two Principles That Can Change How You Think

Effective self-coaching begins with your mindset. In Destination Vocation, we explore two principles that can help veterinary professionals approach their development differently.

1. Approach Every Situation with an Open Mind

One of the most valuable attitudes you can develop is the willingness to approach situations without assuming you already know everything. This doesn't mean disregarding your experience or expertise. It means remaining curious, flexible and open to alternative perspectives.

When you encounter a difficult situation, it's easy to rely on previous experiences or make assumptions about what is happening. However, those assumptions can prevent you from recognising new information or considering different solutions.

By approaching challenges with curiosity, you give yourself permission to ask questions, explore possibilities and learn.

This mindset is particularly valuable when dealing with self-doubt. Rather than immediately deciding that you're incapable of handling something, you can begin asking what you need to understand, learn or practise to move forward.

2. Recognise That You Have More Potential

The second principle is recognising that your current abilities don't define the limits of what you can achieve. It's easy to allow previous experiences, other people's expectations or your own insecurities to shape what you believe is possible.

Perhaps you've avoided applying for a leadership position because you don't feel experienced enough. Maybe you've convinced yourself that you're not naturally confident when communicating with clients.

But your present level of confidence isn't necessarily an accurate reflection of your future capability.

Self-coaching encourages you to look beyond what you can do today and consider what you could achieve with the right learning, support and experience.

Instead of focusing exclusively on your limitations, begin exploring your potential.

• What would you attempt if you were more confident? 
• What skills would help you get there? 
• What opportunities have you been avoiding because you're unsure of yourself?

These questions can help transform vague ambitions into practical development goals.

The Start, Stop, Change Approach

One of the simplest ways to put self-coaching into practice is through the Start, Stop, Change model.

The approach encourages you to regularly reflect on three questions:

• Start: What should I start doing that would help me improve?
• Stop: What am I currently doing that is holding me back?
• Change: What could I approach differently to achieve a better outcome?

Imagine you've had a particularly stressful week at your veterinary practice. You've struggled to keep up with competing priorities, felt reluctant to ask for help and finished several shifts feeling frustrated.

Rather than simply promising yourself that next week will be better, use the three questions to identify specific actions.

You might decide to start asking for support earlier when your workload becomes unmanageable. You could stop automatically agreeing to additional responsibilities without considering your existing commitments. And you might change how you organise your day, giving greater attention to your most important priorities.

None of these actions requires a complete transformation of your working life. They're small, intentional adjustments that can make a meaningful difference over time.

The real value of this approach comes from consistency. By identifying just one thing to start, stop and change each week, you create regular opportunities to reflect, experiment and improve.

Getting Clear on What You Actually Want

One of the most challenging questions in self-coaching is also one of the simplest: What do you want?

It sounds straightforward, but many of us spend so much time meeting expectations, completing tasks and responding to other people's priorities that we rarely stop to consider our own ambitions.

Perhaps you want to become more confident in surgery, develop stronger leadership skills or feel less overwhelmed during busy shifts. Maybe your goals extend beyond the workplace, involving greater personal fulfilment, stronger relationships or more time for activities you enjoy.

Whatever your aspirations, clarity is an important starting point. Once you've identified what you want, the next step is to consider what you're genuinely prepared to do to achieve it.

This is the thinking behind the What Want Question, introduced in Destination Vocation. It challenges you to consider the actions and commitments necessary to move towards your goals.

Wanting to feel more confident is one thing. Taking responsibility for developing that confidence through practice, feedback and learning is another.

The question encourages you to move beyond simply hoping things will improve and begin identifying the actions within your control.

Making Self-Coaching Part of Your Routine

You don't need to dedicate hours to reflection or create an elaborate personal development plan to benefit from self-coaching. In fact, some of the most useful opportunities happen during ordinary working days.

Before a challenging consultation, you might take a moment to consider what you want to achieve and how you'd like to approach the conversation. 

After a difficult case, you could reflect on what went well, what you learned and what you might do differently next time.

At the end of a stressful week, you might use the Start, Stop, Change model to identify one improvement you can make.

The important thing is to approach these moments with curiosity rather than criticism.

Self-coaching isn't about constantly evaluating everything you've done wrong. It's about developing a constructive relationship with yourself, one that recognises your achievements while remaining open to growth.

And remember, coaching yourself doesn't mean doing everything alone. Recognising when you need guidance, feedback or additional support is an important part of taking responsibility for your development.

Becoming Your Own Coach

Stress and self-doubt will always be part of professional life to some degree, particularly in a demanding and constantly evolving field like veterinary medicine.

But those experiences don't have to determine how you see yourself or what you believe you're capable of achieving. By learning to question your assumptions, recognise your emotions and reflect on your experiences, you can develop a more intentional approach to both challenges and opportunities.

You don't need to have every answer, and you certainly don't need to get everything right the first time. What matters is your willingness to remain curious, take ownership of your growth and keep moving forward.

The next time you find yourself questioning your abilities, consider this: are you listening to your inner critic, or are you giving your inner coach a chance to speak?

The questions you ask yourself today could make all the difference to the professional you become tomorrow.